A broken CD drive, no jobs, no shows, no money, and cold weather… I’m sort of grateful to have leftover Thanksgiving turkey to be eating. After all, struggling’s exciting. Isn’t it?

For the past three months I put in 60 hour weeks in real estate, only managing to get to a few auditions. October went really well and at the end of the month I thought I was going to have a nice chunk of money in the bank come December when auditions picked up. But at the end of November, after I paid back the money I’d owed from September, my pockets were bare. I’d not made a single transaction in November. So I set out to find another survival job Read the rest of this entry »

In all the places where man may find riches, he will never find what his heart truly wishes until he finds the tapestry that was woven of the lives of others who’ve chosen to share theirs with him.

Sure, in reality it’s just a Madison Avenue marketing ploy thought up to create buzz and customers for banking giant HSBC. It’s easy to dismiss it as a gimmicky and void of humanity. I’m walking down Seventh Avenue trying to decide whether or not I’ll be able to handle the lowering temperature or if I really belong back in California. Then I see it – a taxi cab – a a restored vintage Checker taxi cab. Upon closer examination though I discover it’s got the HSBC logo plastered all over it. Ever the license plate says HSBC – another guerrilla advertising stunt. I turn away and continue down the avenue. Just ahead there is some guy wearing jeans and a florescent t shirt handling out to-go menus. At least the HSBC cab had some character to it. I turn around and see people gathering around the car to talk to the bank cabbie. Something about the humanity of it made me turn around again and start walking to towards the cab. I had to speak to the driver as well.

New York tends to be a very impersonal place. You become used to ignoring people who look as if they’re about to collapse in front of you Read the rest of this entry »

I gasp for air and grab a new piece of driftwood to take me to shore and remember that when one door closes another opens.

I bet you thought I’d forgotten about you. Well I’ve not — about two months ago I entered real estate school in New York and since recieving my license I’ve been working 12 hour days fairly regularly. I got tired of being poor. The rationalization for starting a career in the middle of a busy audition season was that I needed to if I was going to be here for the next busy audition season. At the end of my financial rope, I experienced regular hunger pains and dizzy spells. My closest friends were the creditors that called to torture me about my financial obligations. Though once a normal part of my life, New York City — at least as I was experiencing it, made these responsibilities seem impossible to meet. I was drowning in a sea of debt, hunger, and loneliness.

So it was time for a new plan. I tried applying for unemployment. Having been fired from a crappy restaurant, I figured I was entitled to collect on some of what I’d paid in taxes. Alas, the bureaucracy is not set up to help anyone who really needs it. After a month, I’d still not recieved a check. To this day, I’ve not seen a cent. So I borrowed the money I needed to get into real estate school, and the money I needed to pay part of my rent (I still owe the other hundred dollars which I used on food). It was a new financial low for me –no credit cards, no cash, and a heaping dose of humility.

I delved down into my soul and found Read the rest of this entry »